I feel like the vast majority will probably read that title and be like “U k hun, do you need your head checking because I think you just said you’re not that excited about christmas?” but I also feel like there are a lot of people that can totally relate to this but are probably quietly shying away from social media in the hopes that all of the OH MY GOD I’M WATCHING ELF messages will be missed.
Because here’s the thing… whilst usually, I love christmas, so much, this year and in particular this month has been absolutely horrendous in every single way. I’ve never really mentioned it on here before, just alluded to it maybe, but I went through a horrendous break up and so, actually, I give zero fucks about Christmas. Have I been through the worst and am slowly, slowly on the up? Yes, absolutely, but it’s still the saddest, loneliest, scariest time and so prancing around like Buddy the Elf is not at the top of my list.
On the other hand, we also lost my Grandad this year, so Christmas will be the first one that my Nan – who now lives with us – and the the rest of us will have to go through without him and honestly, just the very thought makes me want to explode in an overwhelming bubble of grief. But these are just two examples and just for myself… all over the world, there are people out there going through the worst kinds of pain and missing the most special people to them. There are soldiers fighting for our country, there are their families that won’t get to see their soldiers fighting for our country… basically, life isn’t fandabbydozy for everyone right now so Christmas isn’t looked at as “the most wonderful time of the year”, it’s actually the most horrendous because there is this insane pressure to be so goddamn happy, and you’re surrounded by people that are so contagiously happy (which I love FYI and do not begrudge in any way), and, well, you just feel like you need to put on a big fat smile and say “yay, 10 more sleeps and counting” even if it’s the opposite.
Now, I am aware that this sounds morbid AF and please don’t think that I am in any way frustrated or annoyed at anyone excited for the festive season, this absolutely, 100% could not be further from the case, I just think that it’s important to remember those less fortunate in these kinds of times.
So that brings me to the end of one of the most sporadic and random posts I’ve ever posted. I know the vast majority of you are buzzing your tits off insanely excited for Christmas and I love seeing that so, so much, I just think it’s important to remember that life isn’t a bunch of roses for everyone right now and Christmas may actually be the worst, loneliest time imaginable. And if you are feeling like that, I hope this post made you realise that you’re not alone. You never are!
Regardless, I do hope everyone has the most incredible Christmas – or as good as it can be if you’re in a sad place right now – eating all of the pigs in blankets, drinking all of the wine and completely slobbing out for a whole day straight.
For me personally, I’m mainly looking forward to 2016 just being over. My friend recently told me that “New beginnings are often disguised as painful endings” and I am whole heartedly going to believe that. Come on 2017, let’s make it a goodun!
I really liked this post! We lost my granddad nine days before Christmas when I was younger so I know that my family still find it hard without him most years. Sending you lots of love x
http://www.bisoushollyolivia.co.uk
I really liked this post! We lost my granddad nine days before Christmas when I was younger so I know that my family still find it hard without him most years. Sending you lots of love x
http://www.bisoushollyolivia.co.uk
I really needed to read this with the situation I'm going through right now. December in one word for me has been – shitty. My grandpa is in the hospital and I'm scared shitless if he would leave us right at the brink of Christmas. A few people my family knows passed away a few days ago, and it just saddens me that these bad situations has been piled on top of each other for my family this year. I've never felt this un-Christmassy before, a first one for me and I just hope that things will get better in the coming days.
http://www.ashrealasitgets.blogspot.com
Oh Elle, my heart goes out to you because I know EXACTLY how you feel – I actually wrote a really similar post the other day. We lost my 4 year old niece this year and it would have been her birthday tomorrow, so Christmas is even harder for us this year and it can feel so lonely when everyone else is so excited and happy. I hope you and your family manage to have a lovely day together and that it isn't too hard for you. Sending lots of love xxx
Sophie Cliff
What a lovely and honest post Elle. I am completely on board that Christmas is a super difficult and pressurising time for so many, for many different reasons! It is so important to stay mindful of that too. How amazing is Gandys?! What an incredible thing to do – thank you for passing it on <3 Immy x
http://www.immymay.com
I went through a serious breakup this year too and it was hard but looking back it was absolutely for the best. Often things only really make sense in retrospect (obviously I don't know your situation). Sending girl hugs and hope that you have a peaceful time over Christmas, and I always find that the bad times make the good times stand out more 🙂
Such an amazing brand!
Sending lots of hugs your way! x
There's too much pressure at this time of year. I'm sorry to hear about your break up and I know it's very tough without your Grandad. I'm not really looking forward to it either as I have a cold and someone in my family won't be able to enjoy Christmas as they did before. Let's hope for a great 2017 for us both
Suze | LuxuryColumnist
As much as I love Christmas I totally agree that it's super important to stay mindful to the fact that it might in fact be the most horrible time of the year for some people. I think you're right – it's definitely the pressure of having to be so cheery and happy all the time! Whilst most Christmassy things make me feel warm and fuzzy inside, even I've felt that pressure of Christmas Eve (or Christmas Day in the UK) having to be the BEST day ever. And it very rarely quite lives up to those high expectations.
I hope you and your family will get through this time of year together and begin a kickass new year in a few weeks! Hugs! xx
Ps. I've never heard of Gandy's before but it sounds AMAZING!
This is such an honest and heartfelt post. I really enjoyed reading it! While this is a joyous time, it can also be painful. I love your outfits though, and I'm going to have to check out Gandy's! Cheers to a new year and a fresh start in 2017!
xoxo
Rachel
http://thetrendytomboy.com/
So sorry to hear about the loss of your grandad and break up. Christmas certainly is never the same after the loss of a family member. I also have experienced loss and it's especially painful at this time of year.
Gemma x
http://www.jacquardlfower.uk
So adorable ♥
With Love,
Anna || Curly Yorker
I'm very sorry to hear about your breakup, Elle – hard at any time but especially at this time of year. There is so much pressure on people to have the "perfect" Christmas and really there is no such thing. My Granda died on Christmas Day so it's always bittersweet for me. I hope you manage to enjoy the next few days as much as you can. Spending time with family is what makes Christmas special xx
Beautylymin| LuxuryFragranceBundleGiveaway
You are SUCH a babe and it's totally OK to not be looking forward to Christmas – this year is actually the first I've looked forward to in a few years and the first Christmas without a family member is really hard. Spend your time surrounded by the people you love so you can be there for each other, lots of love <3 xxx
Ahh thank you so much for sharing, I can relate! I have actually just lost someone who was my grandad figure today so this is incredibly close to home. If it has taught me anything it's that spending time with family and focusing all efforts into that is so important, especially around Christmas! I hope you do have a lovely day regardless, best wishes for 2017 xx
This is an honest post!
http://zunera-serena.com/
Firstly, you look amazing – if you don't feel festive you look it, and super hot. Please drop me a message any time of day or night if you need some to talk to. Lots of love 🙂
Lauren x
Britton Loves | Lifestyle Beauty Wellbeing
I relate to this post so much, a few years ago I had a very very bad year and Christmas meant nothing to me, life can be punch after punch sometimes and I just hope for you that you have a fantastic 2017!
Also, what an amazing story about Rob and Paul, well done to them.
Hope you're feeling happier soon Elle xx
Rosy | Sparkles of Light Blog
My Instagram | Instagram
Thank you for sharing this post. Like you said – it's nice that people are excited but to also take into consideration that others can't/don't/won't necessarily have a great time of it.
Meg | Elmpetra
So sorry to hear about the breakup, Ellie, but I can already see you're onto bigger better things! I find Christmas really hard, so I can relate somewhat. JK Rowling said something great on Twitter earlier: 'Christmas Day is, in the end, just a day. It isn’t a test or a scorecard of you or your life, so be kind to yourself'. Hope you can do the same. Merry Christmas <3 x
Martha Jane Edwards | http://www.marthajaneedwards.com
Aw I am so sorry to hear about your breakup and how hard this month has been on you! I dont blame you for not caring about Christmas this year, at least a new year is just around the corner and I am a true believer of everything happens for a reason so I know 2017 will be extra amazing for you!:)
<3 Shannon
Upbeat Soles
Sorry to know that sad news. But I want to say that you deserve better. Now just forget the sadness and cheer up. Enjoy the holiday . BTW, you look amazing with that black sweater.
You look so beautiful! Great photos <3
MERI WILD BLOG
Hahah love this! My family don't really celebrate Christmas so I totally get you!
moorizZLA xx
Aw my heart goes out to you.
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