Many moons ago when the weather wasn’t so cold that it felt like your fingertips could fall off 10 seconds after walking outside (I started writing this a few months ago in the depths of winter FYI), I went down to Cornwall for one of the most chilled trips of 2018. I was invited by a beautiful hotel, and to be totally honest… as lovely as it looked and “nice” as the google images looked, it just wasn’t a trip that was at the top of my list. I wasn’t, how can I say this…. Buzzing my t*ts off? Apparently that’s what the cool kids say so we’ll go with that. I was happy to be exploring Cornwall but I wasn’t racing around with joy and excitement. That was until I arrived in Cornwall and immediately realised that google images does a horrific job of selling’s Cornwall incredible beauty, and nobody quite tells you how magical this place is.
So we arrived at the Fistral Beach hotel which has the most perfect views known to man. Our pretty gigantic room – with insane balcony – was complete with personalised robes (anyone else a total sucker for personalisation?) and amazing service from the staff. The thing about Fistral beach is, it’s sort of luxurious but friendly. It’s not like one of those pretentious places that makes you feel as common as the Artful Dodger, it’s relaxing and peaceful and a total little haven in Newquay.
Now, talking of relaxation… I managed to hustle (/I was kindly offered but hustle sounds more gritty) a massage for myself and boyf and jesus f**king christ, it was easily up there in my top 3 ever massages.
And yes I win first prize for such a pretentious leaderboard but girl likes a massage. I was so relaxed at Fistral beach that I did the super cute thing of falling asleep and dribbling whilst catching flies… no you’re sexy!
After the massage of dreams – it got a thumbs up by Dan FYI who said, quote “she put all these nice smells under my nose and I got to choose. There was at least 5. Amazing” – we got ready for dinner, otherwise known as a feast.
I cannot for the life of me remember the name of the incredible manager who looked after us at dinner – and breakfast the next day – but he was possibly the most wonderful manager/waiter/sommelier (I know, fancy)/human being ever and made us feel totally at home.
Ya know, if my home was a 5* hotel and I got a 3 course meal delivered to me with wine to pair.
The food was stunning, as was the breakfast buffet the next day (which was well needed because I tried port for the first time and reaaallllyyy) liked it. Lol.
The only downer of the trip was slight work hiccups – polite way of saying we were both dealing with bellends unhelpful clients so sadly had to cancel our surfing lessons with the Fistral beach surf school which, I was gutted about…. until I dipped my toe in the sea and I still don’t think the feeling has returned to it.
So, instead, a few hours later I borrowed a surfboard for some pictures and became the epitome of “all the gear and no idea”.
Overall, it was 3 days of total peace and serenity and bloody incredible food and that is something I am 100% up for any time.
Thank you so much to the Fistral Beach hotel for having us, we will definitely be back! Just maybe when the sea is warmer than Voldermort’s heart 😉